MANifesto

Girls stop giving it away. You have it, they want it. Make them work for it. Don't play that bs "i want it too" card, because we all know we can hold out longer than they can. You can get your shit paid for by bring cute and charming and witty and not having to give it up.

Chapter 1: How to not be retarded
You are the only one that's going to look out for you. Do a good job of it.
It's ok to get drunk, but never drink to the point where your safety is in someone else's hands. Always know your surroundings, and always know its Ok to leave. Also always ALWAYS know, if you don't want to, you don't have to.
Never blame any of your actions on you being drunk. That's a cheap way out, and we all know you intended on doing it before you drank anything.

Chapter 2: How to have fun, even if it's not fun
We all have rolled up to a situation filled with uggos and gumps. Go into everything with an "all is not lost" attitude. If you look like you're having fun, people will think you're having fun, and will start to think they're having fun, and soon everyone will be having fun thats real. Or at least it will be good for pics.
Nobody knows what they're doing, but if you look you do, people will believe you. Command a room. Be the life of your own party, and everyone else will attend.

Chapter 3: Spend time by yourself
Ride the metro or some shit. Eye fuck strangers. Once you're married and have kids and a pomeranian, you can't do this anymore. So be harmlessly slutty on public transportation. Listen to music others will judge you for but that you love.

Chapter 4: Don't date d-bags
They're surprisingly easy to spot. If someone shows you who they are, believe them. Don't make excuses for anyone. Don't be flakey. Be nice to those that are nice. Good boys are easy to find, you're probably just ignoring them cause they're not cute. Also, if you're sitting around unearthing cold mazzerella sticks and salsa wondering why you don't have a boyfriend, it's because you're eating cold mazzy sticks and salsa. Go out and make your own luck. There will always be someone happy to date you, you just have to search uninhibited. I once dated a guy for a month who i thought was autistic. Wow, that's embarrassing.

Chapter 5: Don't talk about yourself all the time
It's annoying and people will tire of you quickly

Chapter 6: Date early, date often
Have several balls in the air at once. If you date four 6's, that equals dinners paid for. Enjoy other's company with no expectations. Also this will make you seem less clingy and more desirable. Also when you do meet one that's good, you can fully know what you want based on what you have.

Chapter 7: Be funny
Fuck if it's totes innapropes. Someone will think it's funny, and tell someone about something you said, thus you will be indelible. Be confident even when you lookin rough. Walk with your shoulders back. act like you know something even when you didn't do the reading.